So far...

...this is the oldest I've ever been.

I started reading a book this morning, I've only read one chapter so far and I can tell it is going to be very philosophical.  I like those kinds of books. The chapter I've read puts into prospective where we fit into the universe.  It said I should go outside and absorb the universe, seeing not just the large obvious things, but the minute.  As I sat there, I discovered I was not absorbing the universe, it was absorbing me.  As the book said, I will discover just how tiny I am.  The book is right.

The book also said I am where I am supposed to be.  It has taken my whole lifetime to get here, but I realized this morning along the way, unbeknownst to me the universe has absorbed me.  This brought on much contemplation. How lucky I have been and am.  Most of the time the universe has kept me safe and secure, sprinkling in moments of joy, sorrow, anguish, hope, and every other emotion a 'minuscule molecule' like myself can handle.  Oh, and its even given me moments of "turning my hair grey" fear (like when I thought my daughter and I were going to die during one of California's earthquakes).  Thanks to you universe, those moments have been few and far between.

A few years ago I came across the little saying that says, 'So far this is the oldest I've ever been.' I liked that a lot.  This morning's revelation about my being where I am supposed to be made me wonder...how long am I going to be allowed where I am (universe-wise)?  Such a thought gave me quite a heady-ache, so I've decided I'm not going to even concern myself about that. Considering the microscopic blob I am on one of the universe's Petri dishes I think I'm just going to let the universe handle the how long.  That way if I'm fortunate to wake up tomorrow morning and put my feet on the floor, that will be the moment I'm the oldest I've ever been.  Again, thank you universe.

To be honest, all this pondering gave me great comfort, it's nice to know I've become absorbed by the universe. I realize I'm not and I will never be alone.  For with all the other microscopic blobs on my Petri dish, and those on all the other universe's Petri dishes none of us will ever be alone.  I've gained a new appreciation for the blobs even smaller than I. Hello, cells.  Hello, grains of sand.  Hello, butterfly and bee. Hello, birds of song.  Thank you, universe.