Tuesday, July 29, 2014


...there's this mole.

(Isn't there always.)

It's been very persistent this last week.  Every morning I go out to my back yard, and...there...on both sides of my sidewalk are two mounds of dirt.  They're directly across from each other.  It's been infuriating.  I've been taking out my broom and dust pan, sweeping up the mess, and depositing the dirt in various gardens.


The first couple of days, after the clean-up, I would simply stomp the sod back down over the open hole, somewhat covering it up, and walk away.


When I discovered being nice, and hoping the mole might consider living in harmony with me was not going to work, and getting frustrated at having to clean up every morning after its night time labors I decided to take decisive action and shove some rocks down the holes and block its way.  Yeah, right!


The mole's invasion continued...it simply pushed the rocks out along with new dirt. Finally yesterday, and as Popeye used to say "That's all I can stands, can't stands no more." I cleaned up the piles of dirt, swept the sidewalk clean (again), (and...this is hyperbole)...rolled boulders the size of the moon into the gigantic open pits, then shoved the sod back into place and stomped, stomped, stomped till sweat dropped of my brow.  As Elmer Fudd used to say, That'll show that "wasically wabbit"...er' mole who's in charge around here.

Well, to tell the truth, when I awoke this morning I expected to find that the mole had somehow managed to push my boulders out of their tunnels and I would find a note attached to them stating, "Ha, ha, fooled you...I win. Been here long before you, will be here long after."  I was not looking forward to the trek along the sidewalk to the battle ground.

Son of a gun.

There were no mounds of dirt, no boulders, no note.  I win!  I win!  But, as Foghorn Leghorn would say..."That's a joke son, that's a joke."  Nobody ever wins over a mole.

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