Yesterday

Boy, yesterday sure proved it.  Son of a gun!  I'm old.  I think I need to find new hobbies that do not require physical labors.  My day went something like this.

It's summer, time to put away my spring garlands and garnishes that muck up my house...bouquets of artificial flowers, bowers, and wreaths.  You know what I'm talking about...DUST CATCHERS. It didn't take long to put the spring stuff away, I simply grabbed the empty plastic, see through, storage containers and threw the crap into them.  Piece of cake.

Then, because I'm constantly going through my twenty-some plastic, see through, storage containers the ones marked summer were all over the place...thank goodness I had the foresight to label the containers.  (In the process of moving things around I discovered, the cardboard boxes job to cover the window of my makeshift laundry room had slipped and light was once more coming in...well, THAT has got to be fixed.) However, I decided to concentrate on setting up my summer arrangements...you know, crap...dust catchers.

I really should be more tidy.

Anyway, I discovered I had to 'remake' every single arrangement because I had not been...tidy...when I put them away.

Sadly this took hours, I'm talking hours.  SERIOUSLY.

Finally I've got the bouquets of artificial flowers, bowers, and wreaths exactly the way I wanted them, and breathed a sigh of relief.  The empty summer containers are neatly stacked back in the garage.  I have a bunch of darling frogs I like to sit in my morning room and this was to be my last chore, to sit them out. The box they are stored in sits on a shelf just above the garage refrigerator, I grab my stool and pull it off the shelf.

Uh-oh!

There is that  gaping hole where the cardboard covering the window has slipped.  CRAP.  I had forgotten about that.  So, before sitting out my frogs, I decide to fix the window covering first.  Since the duct tape, didn't hold (I'm sure because the shelf and everything surrounding it is covered with years of dust), I decided to thumbtack the cardboard into place.  Pound, pound, pound, tack, tack, tack.  This took about half an hour, and required moving boxes out of place and then putting them back.

By now it is late afternoon...I've not eaten...I'm very hungry, but I'm gonna' get those frogs set up or die trying.  One by one I extract them from their enclosure, and put them in place in the morning room.  CRAP. All of a sudden a hand falls off of one of them.  Apparently it must have fallen off before, because I can see I had done a make-shift repair job sometime in the past.

Okay, I re-evaluate the situation.  Perhaps I should eat then tackle the repair.  Yeah, that's the ticket.  I will fortify myself.  I fix myself a twice baked potato with chicken and gravy.

While I'm watching TV I repair that frog's hand, and then discover a second frog has lost a little tuft of artificial grass that I had attached to the back of it. CRAP.  Well, by now I'm exhausted, and knew I should have put off this chore until the morning...but I'm bound and determined I'm gonna' finish today's chores.

I poured and poured glue over that sucker.  This time that grass was going to stick in place till that dang frog disintegrated around it. I held it into place until I thought the glue had set.  The tuft of grass was so slathered in glue, it simply slid off.  I'm such an a--, dumb old woman, or, as Frankie would say IDIOT.  By now, it is midnight, I'm still trying to hold the tuft into place.  It refuses to stick.

In desperation, I grab a plastic sandwich bag and lay it on my TV tray, then flip the frog over, so the tuft of grass is between the plastic bag and the weight of the frog itself.  Surely by morning the glue will have dried, and I can put the frog in its place among the others.

Fast forward.  It's Sunday morning.  I go about my regular routine, and then go to check my frog.  It is not 'stuck' to the sandwich bag.  That's a good thing, right?  But when I turn it around I can see the glue as not dried.  CRAP.