PCH

Oh, yes, we've all been there, at one time or another, sucked in by that large envelope that comes in the mail.

On the outside it says in big bold print "YOU MAY ALREADY BE A WINNER".

I've always thrown them away without even opening them.  Until last year when finances for the nation, city and us citizens took a dive into our toilets. I figured what the heck.  So, early in the year, I carefully followed the instructions (so I would not disqualify myself), even bought a couple of things (hoping to increase my odds) ROFLMAO, and sent the whole shebang back to PCH.

Then, I waited, and waited, and waited.

Nobody came to my door with a giant sized check (in any amount) and a big bunch of red roses.  I was not surprised.  I think my chance of winning anything was one in a bazillion. But the only thing it cost me was the price of a stamp, and the things I purchased and didn't really want or need, so through the whole process I was still hopeful to the bitter end.

So, even though I didn't win the first time, later in the year when a second packet appeared in my mailbox I figured, what the heck and again CAREFULLY FOLLOWED the instructions and returned the papers to PCH.  A while later, I got a mysterious little card in the mail.  It was upbeat and unlike anything I had received the first time around.  It guaranteed my number was a winner, but I now had to return just a bit more information to remain eligible for my prize.  I immediately returned the required information.

Then yesterday in my mailbox was another small, curious envelope from PCH.  On the outside in red letters it read URGENT: TIME SENSITIVE.

I checked the return address, it states this came from the OFFICE OF THE SR. VICE PRESIDENT at PCH.  Wow, I was impressed. In my head I thought perhaps I was indeed on a special winners list and couldn't wait to tear open the envelope and see what the vice president wanted me to do.

Inside across the top, in very big white letters against a black background it read.
WARNING  URGENT NOTICE  oh me, oh my, I was told I needed to go to a specific page on the PCH website and insert a mysterious activation code that will "allow me to continue and obtain a valid entry that will be added to the winner selection list."

Now, I'm no dummy, I know this is a scam, and did from the start, still I could not help myself, I had to play this out to the end...and besides, so far all this cost me was a few USPS stamps, what did I have to lose? 

I rush to my computer, type in the website address and sure enough I'm at the "special page".  All I have to do to proceed to the winner selection list is provide them with my personal information and e-mail address, and leave a comment if I choose. 

Okay, I've carried this thing as far as I choose.  The scam was complete.  Oh, can you imagine the junk mail I would start receiving if I actually filled out this information.  As a final gesture, I tried to see if I could leave a comment without having to fill out my personal information, using words a polite old woman would not usually use, and of course discovered that was not possible.

So, I left the "special PCH page", took my urgent letter and put it through my shredder.

Insert several sighs here.

I guess I will not have somebody coming to my door with a giant sized check and a bouquet of red roses any time soon. 

Oh, and PCH, here's part of the comment I would have liked to have left you. 
You can kiss my..........!